General Conference

Roberto and I really enjoyed watching General Conference this past weekend. We chose to watch the conference over the Internet, which I feel is a great way when you have small children. You can pause and rewind the talks, making it easier to take care of the kids and not miss the messages. All of the talks were amazing, but three in particular really touched my heart.

Obviously, any talk about raising children, the family, or mothers sparked my curiosity. Since most of my readers are mothers as well, I thought you guys would enjoy reading what church leaders had to say on these subjects. FYI, what I have written here is mainly the words and ideas of the speakers, not my own. I am not directly quoting anything here because alot of this is coming from my notes and memory and is a bit sketchy.

Neal A. Maxwell's talk in the first session was beautiful. He talked about how to teach children. He said to teach only by persuasion. To persuade children, you must teach them quietly, lovingly, promptly, and not publicly. To do this, it requires long-suffering, gentleness, kindness, and love. You cannot try to control them. You must listen to them and inspire them through your own example. Not too much pressure, huh? But he is 100% right. I find myself trying to control my children from time to time. It does not work. All they do is rebel more. On the other hand, when I calm myself, go down to their level, try to understand what they are thinking, and listen to their feelings, I can better teach my kids and they are more likely to listen.

Another talk that I enjoyed was given by Sister Lunt. She talked alot about family traditions and why they are so important. She asked if our traditions are mostly material in nature, or are they spiritual? This statement really hit me because I have asked myself this question many times before. So many holidays, especially Easter and Christmas, are commercialized to appeal to young children and parents' wallets. When this happens, the true meaning is lost. Everything seems to revolve around gifts, food, sweets, etc. There is nothing wrong with these things, but they can easily distract young children from the true meaning of what is being celebrated. I also feel that there are such better ways to spend our money as a family than on these trivial things. I'd like to buy less and save our money more for family trips and vacations that create memories. I'd also like to teach our children about service by making Christmas, Easter, birthdays, and other commercialized holidays less about receiving and more about giving and focusing on our blessings.

The last talk that I really enjoyed and learned alot from was given by Russell M. Ballard. He spoke about how mothers can reduce the pressures that are put upon them and enjoy their family more. I felt like crying out loud "Hallelujah!!!" This is the hardest part of being a mom, because you are torn between giving your children your full, undivided attention, and trying to juggle all the demands of running a home. His words were inspiring.
(1) He said to "live in the moment." He said to do this because the joys come in moments. There will will hard times and frustrating times, and then there will be shining moments of happiness. If we are not living in the moment, we will miss those moments of happiness. A line he used that I love was this--"Treasure the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less." He also told a story of a mother whose children were all grown and how she wished she would have done just that. She would reflect on her memories of her children and look at pictures of them when they were young, and she would wish she could remember how they looked, sounded, and what they talked about. This made me cry because I think of my babies and how precious they are to me. I do not want to forget anything as well, which is why I am constantly on here writing about the silly things they do and say. It means alot now, but it will mean even more in the years to come when those memories have disappeared from my mind.
(2) He also said to be careful not to over schedule activities. He said that families need unstructured time where connections can deepen and real parenting can take place. You need time to time to talk with one another, and to laugh and play. This is not an issue for my family at this moment since the kids are little, but it is good advice to remember once they are older and want to involved in many after school activities.
(3) He also said that mothers need personal time for themselves. Pick one or two things that you enjoy doing or want to learn about and make the time for it. You will be a better mother because of it.
(4) Lastly, and most importantly in my opinion, pray, study, and teach the gospel.

If your children see you doing these things, you cannot go wrong.